justkarkar

Free-Spirited Whore

Posted on: May 11, 2012

I hate people.

Sometimes, I can have a lovely time with people when there is no exchange of words, thoughts, knowledge and I’m ok with that.

It’s the talking that messes everything up.

There’s this guy (A) I’ve known for years. He’s been cool. We run into each other every year or so, communicate for a little bit and fall off. That’s the pattern, and I’m ok with it. His reputation has always unsettled me. Not in a “I need to stay away from you” sense, but in a “there’s a reason they call you that, so don’t try to put shit past me, bruh” way.

Early Monday morning, he texts me, which is not unusual. He works from like 5am – 2pm, so it’s cool to have some entertainment during my commute.

The conversation turns to one of our mutual acquaintances (B). I went to high school with B. A now works with B. A says, “I envy B and his wife. They’re so perfect for each other.”

I agreed that they are absolutely lovely together, then said something typical about not envying people because there’s always more than meets the eye.

He turned the conversation to love. Commitment.

Specifics escape me, but he asked if I want, or if I believe in “love and commitment.”

Do IIIIII believe in love and commitment? Dude. Who doesn’t want love and commitment. Speaking only for myself, to love and be loved is the end game. What is better than being able to open up to someone mentally, emotionally, physically, and know they won’t hurt you? To find peace, comfort and solace in their arms at the end of the day? (And follow that up with marathon sex, but I didn’t say this to him cuz we aren’t THAT tight.) At this point I’m overcome with daydreams of love. And probably somewhere in my subconscious associating these feelings with him and his stats have suddenly improved. That’s just the way it goes.

His response. “Wow. I never took you for the ‘love and commitment’ type. I thought you were a free spirit. That’s good to know.”

Dude.

That was just…

WHAT THE FUCK DOES BEING A “FREE SPIRIT” HAVE TO DO WITH LOVE AND COMMITMENT?

You’re ignorance has dried me up like the Sahara desert. Conversation over.

Free spirit means I do/think what makes ME happy, rather than what society says I have to do and believe.

And LOVE makes me happy.

The thing that bothers me, is not that he didn’t know what free-spirit means. It’s that he used the statement to gauge my… idk, level of difficulty? He threw that out there hoping I would say I believed in free love and that I was into getting my rocks off regardless of emotional attachment.

Men sure know how to talk their way out of my good graces.

Not that this is a loss… I’m ok not speaking to this jerk.

Three days later, he texted me and said “I had another dream about you.”

Instinct told me where this was going, but oh? You never told me what the first one was about.

“Both times I was eating your pussy. And it tasted like cinnamon.”

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??? When did it become okay to use lewd as a flirt tactic?

I’m NOT that chick, and well, now, you’ve absolutely guaranteed you’ll never find out.

I hate people.

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  • NVRGVUP: Love is where it's at!
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